Monday, August 30, 2004

Descending into Eating Disorders

[Copied from my first blog, A Nickel for My Thoughts]

I understand now how easy it is to fall unsuspectingly into an eating disorder. So I mentioned that I lost 12 pounds in 2 weeks? It was so easy for me. I simply cut my calories down to 1500 a day, and what with all the exercising I do, the weight just dropped off. So now I fit into clothes I wore in college again, and in fact weigh less than I have since I started college. But yet I still manage to look at myself and think that I need to lose more weight. I look down at my thighs and see these big fat sausages. I want more definition in my arms, I want a six-pack... I've stopped counting what I'm eating on the weekends though because I really don't think it's healthy for me to lose more weight, but it's so hard to actually look at myself and be satisified with what I see. Why is it that I can be so happy with everything else in my life - my wonderful husband, great job, incredible family - and yet I still feel like I need to be thinner?

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